#Metoo-psychological Women's victory over their greatest fears!

When men in high places lose their jobs due to courageous women coming forward to share their horrible experiences in public, it's easy to forget how serious the problem of sexual assault has become in today's society. Such charges or behaviours are often dismissed by many men (and even some women) as "boys will be boys."

Sexual Assault: What Is It?

The crime of sexual assault is one of the most serious and devasting types of violent crime. As time passes, the sufferer is left with a lasting traumatic scar that no amount of time can repair or erase. It's time to quit making excuses for these dishonourable (mostly male) criminals in our culture and society..

Sexual assault (and its twin, sexual abuse) is not about the abuser performing a sex act on the victim.

As a matter of fact, it's all about who has more power: the abuser or victim. In most cases, the perpetrators of these crimes are men who abuse women, and most victims are aware of their abuser. However, sexual assault is commonly defined as short-term or rare, but for the victim, these distinctions are irrelevant.

Sadly, we are seeing an increasing number of incidences of sexual assault in India.

Every fifth woman has been raped at some time in her life, according to a recent survey (and one in 71 men). That figure climbs to one in four women on college campuses (and one in seven men). Over 90% of the time, it is done by a romantic partner or a friend of the person. Women account for 91 percent of rape and sexual assault and rape victims, while men account for nine percent.

Sexual assault is on the rise.

Sex abuse can come in various forms but all of them have one thing in common: unwanted sexual activity is a part of it. The victim may be forced to watch the perpetrator engage in a sexual action on their own, or inappropriately reveal their genitals, as part of that activity. There is no shame in utilising threats, violence, or taking advantage of a victim's position to acquire what they want from sexual abusers (such as an employee).

Those who commit acts of sexual assault enjoy taking advantage of the victim's inability to defend themselves. Alcohol or drugs can be used as a means of intoxicating victims in order to ensure that they are compliant. The victim is more likely to blame themselves or themselves for taking the drugs or alcohol, which reduces the likelihood of the victim reporting the crime to the authorities (although the administration of drugs is often non-consensual).

It is common for powerful, prominent men who participate in sexual assault to assume that they are entitled to both verbally harass and sexually abuse anyone at any time. They feel that their position of power—whether it comes from riches, family background, professional role, politics, or corporate leadership—doesn't apply to regular cultural and societal norms. For these males, "I'm owed this, and you can't do anything about it—who would believe you over me?" is a recurring theme.

Why Do Some Men Abuse Women Sexually?

There are a plethora of rationales and justifications offered by those who commit these atrocities. Victims justify their acts by claiming that the other person was causing them to engage in molestation, according to Jaydip Sarkar of Singapore's Institute of Mental Health. There were five ideas used to justify their prior actions, which Sarkar refers to as "cognitive distortion," by the offenders.

They believe that women are inherently different from me and therefore cannot be comprehended. Because of this, encounters with women will be confrontational and women will be deceitful about what they actually want. An example of a Cognitive Distortion may be "...she is dressed in tight pants and her cleavage is apparent. It's clear that she wants sex, and she'll let it if I have it with her, even if she tells me "no." Sarkar (2013, p. 3)

When it comes to men's sexual desires, women are continually available, but they may not be aware of it all of the time. If a woman is physically harmed during sexual activity, it is impossible for her to be harmed by sexual activity, which means she cannot be hurt by it. I can think of an example of this: "...when she looks furtively at me when I make filthy jokes, she is truly interested in me.... As a result, when she replies "no," she's just playing a joke on me to get me even more excited. Sarkar (2013, p. 3)

When a man is excited, he can't help but proceed to orgasm, and he can't control it. This cognitive distortion may present itself in the statement: "... I would become weak if my "dhat" (semen) runs out" (premature ejaculation while molestation or sexual harassment of a woman) in India, where the syndrome of "male sexual weakness" or dhat syndrome is common. Sarkar (2013, p. 3)

Women have a responsibility to meet the sexual wants of men, and they should do so at the drop of a hat. Such Cognitive Distortions of male entitlement, especially if the victim is lower status for any reason (socioeconomic, caste, etc.) can lead to marital rape in a society like India with severe gender-based inequities (recommended to be considered a crime in the Verma Commission report). Sarkar (2013, p. 3)

A dangerous world: People need to be on guard, but there is no safe haven in this hostile and menacing environment. Some examples are: I have been wronged in many ways, and so it is not evil for me to do harm to others." Sarkar (2013, p. 3)

Trauma inflicted can last a lifetime, and it is never-ending.

Victims of criminal sexual assault often have to suffer with the effects of the trauma for the rest of their lives. As a result of the assault, 81% of women (and 35% of men) will experience PTSD, anxiety, or a major depressive disorder.

For those who have been sexually assaulted, suicidal thoughts and attempts appear to be significantly elevated; in comparison to other disorders, sexual assault was related with the highest risk for suicidality" (Dworkin et al., 2017). OCD and bipolar disorder have also been linked to sexual assault victims, according to a comprehensive review of the literature on sexual assault.

It is rare for perpetrators to think about, much less care about, how their actions affect their victims. It's virtually always in the context of feeling the victim is solely to fault for getting oneself into a scenario with the perpetrator, which is how most people interpret it.

Victims of sexual assault are typically helped by psychotherapy sessions.

Because so many sexual assault victims blame themselves (and society too often does), the healing process can take a long time. A victim's cognitive distortions are typical, yet no one would ever want this to happen to their best friend, much less themselves. When it comes to healing from sexual assault, time is an important factor, but in most cases, time alone isn't enough for most people.

Is there a reason why so many victims of sexual assault don't go to the police?

By going over the incident with law enforcement authorities multiple times, victims often feel like they have been victimised again. When it comes to dealing with sexual assault reports in a caring and sensitive manner, not all of these people have the required training.

When a victim is questioned by law enforcement, they are almost always asked questions such, "What were you wearing at the time of the assault?" and, "Have you had anything to drink?"

What Is Society's Role in Sexual Assault Perpetrator?

People should not ask victims of sexual assault, "What were you wearing?" as a way of re-victimizing them. Inquiringly, "Did you overindulge?" How did you handle it? Because of this crime, it is important to teach criminals that people's limits and rights must always be respected at all times. "Are you sure he was aware of this?"

Sexual action is not consent if the participant does not provide their permission.

Violent acts are not acceptable just because a person is in a position of authority over another person. "Oh, that's just locker-room banter," or "They were only 18, what do they know?" are common explanations for poor behaviour by offenders. Instead, society and family members should emphasise the importance of dignity, respect, and morality, rather than making excuses for bad behaviour by perpetrators. Women aren't here to be oppressed or exploited in any way.

Helping Others & Getting Help

It is imperative that you get help if you are a sexual assault perpetrator right away. For the people you've hurt, your dysfunctional behaviour is likely to have caused them lasting harm that they will never be able to recover from. Therapists that specialise in working with sexual assault perpetrators can be found across the country. Proactively contacting someone today is a sign of strength.

If someone tells you that they've been the victim of a sexual assault, please listen to them without making assumptions about their situation. Offer unreserved emotional support and be a good listener. Then, if necessary, offer to assist them in obtaining the resources they need to get back on their feet. If they don't want to talk about the assault, then don't bring it up. Be supportive, but don't nag or indicate there is only one "correct" way to respond to the assault.

If you've been a victim, don't forget that assistance is available. Remember that sexual assault is not your fault if you have been a victim. Even if your own family or certain people in your life don't believe you, professionals and friends will.

Please, don't wait any longer to seek assistance.

References

1.     Dworkin, ER, Menon, SV, Bystrynski, J, Allen, NE. (2017). Sexual assault victimization and psychopathology: A review and meta-analysis. Clinical Psychology Review, 56, 65-81.

2.     Davis, KC, Neilson, EC, Wegner, R, Danube, CL. (2018). The intersection of men’s sexual violence perpetration and sexual risk behavior: A literature review. Aggression and Violent Behavior, 40, 83-90.

3.     https://www.theodysseyonline.com/psychology-behind-sexual-assult

4.      Malamuth, N. M., & Brown, L. M. (1994). Sexually aggressive men's perceptions of women's communications: Testing three explanations. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 67(4), 699-712. http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.67.4.699

5.      Sarkar, J. (2013). Mental health assessment of rape offenders. Indian Journal of Psychiatry, 55(3), 235–243. http://doi.org/10.4103/0019-5545.117137

Automation Of Thoughts in the World of Machines

We are evolving by every minute and the last decade has seen mind-blowing leap in technology, much beyond our imagination and will continue to do so.  

One of the reasons behind the newer inventions of our today’s world is algorithms. We can almost feel their presence—that somewhere far away, we’re interacting with a machine. Many users (approx. 60 percent), according to the best research, are completely unaware of its existence. But does it really matter to them? The answer is no. Otherwise, we wouldn’t have so many people glued to mobile phones.

Going deep into the effects of algorithm and the space it occupies in our lives today, try to imagine one of those earliest computers with its nervously blinking lights and long rows of dials. To tweak the algorithm, the engineers turn the knob, as they  continuously try to make small adjustments, here and there, so that the machine performs to their satisfaction. However, there was always something lacking.

But how do the engineers of today know which dial to twist and how much without actually being present all the time? There’s a whole discipline created in today’s world which was unheard when I was a kid, data science, to guide the writing and revision of algorithms. This makes a few individuals control the behavior and experience of thousands of people.

Although, we’re in the earliest days of this revolution, of course. But we can see where it’s heading.

Imagine, algorithms replicating the process of creativity, then there will be hardly any reason to nurture human creativity. Why would the next generation bother with the tortuous, inefficient process of writing or painting, if a machine can create something seemingly as good and in a painless flash?

The result being, we are having fewer people in manufacturing plants and warehouses now, even though their capacities and production rates are rising.

 Again in the near future, we will have lesser and lesser drivers on the road as “cars and trucks begin to drive themselves”.

And believe it or not, we will have lesser and lesser last mile delivery jobs as drones start to do them more efficiently and cheaply.

This has been a ‘hot potato’ in the news in the last couple of years as more and more people are worried and threatened at the thought that in a couple of decades, many jobs will be overtaken by machine, leaving 3/4th of the world’s population with no meaningful way to earn a living. Some call it “Artificial Intelligence”

But there is another angle and a deeper impact of the above automations which we are missing.

Should we bother about the automation of machines? Does it have any effect on our thought process?

I have already explained the empty space created in the brain from solving arithmetic problems to decision making which is being taken over by the machines. This has created more scope for automaton of thought which instead of utilizing the human brain's uniqueness and creativity goes into automation of thoughts.

Let me give you an example.

When I was a child, I would go to the library and look among hundreds of books to pick one that I would read for the day. But now, the moment I’m done reading one, I already have a recommendation (which is pretty good by the way) for what I ought to read next. This happens with books I read, the music I listen to, the clothes I buy, the  plays and movies I watch, the dates I go on, the food I order, the restaurants I visit,  the places I travel to, etc.

Since the early days of my life, I always had an excellent memory (probably still do). I would remember and recollect friend’s birthdays and phone numbers. I used to remember a lot of the things like the stories I read and could easily quote from books I read. Now most of them are automated and I do not need to trouble my mind anymore. All I need is an Internet connection.

When I was a kid, I used to be really good with arithmetic calculations (probably still am). I could multiply big numbers in a matter of seconds and could solve difficult math problems without writing down a thing. Now, all that has been automated and I don’t need it anymore. All I need is a computing device.

What jobs are best suited for us, who should be our friends, what food we should eat, whom we should date, what we should do on weekends, are all served up to us as recommendations by effective and highly sophisticated engines?

The result being, a lot of our thoughts and our choices have been automated. Well, you might be thinking you are still in control as to which of the recommendations you click on and watch. Think again!

A lot of analysis has gone into deciding what choices are presented in what contexts and what positions, so that you are most likely to pick them.

In that sense, you still make a choice, because the algorithms are personalized to cater to your tastes. But that choice is now automated.

The engineering mindset has little patience for the manic obsession of words and images, for the mystique of art, for morality and emotional intelligence. This kind of mindset only views humans as data, components of systems, abstractions. With this kind of cold-blooded thinking, so divorced from the uniqueness and mystery of human life, it’s easy to understand for anyone ,how long-standing values  have suddenly begun to seem like an annoyance—why a term  like privacy carries so little weight in the engineer’s dictionary, why  publishing and journalism seem so imminently disruptive  and biased.

So, one thing is absolutely clear that algorithms are meant to erode free will, to alleviate mankind of the burden of choosing, to push them to think in a particular direction. Algorithms bring in the creator a sense of omnipotence, the condescending belief that our behavior can be altered, without our even being aware of the hand guiding us, in a superior direction. That was always the danger of the engineering mindset, as it moves beyond its roots in building inanimate stuff and begins to design a more perfect social world. We are only the screws and bolts in the grand design.

In the coming time, free will and choice will be more and more a theoretical concept.

Our thoughts, choices and consequently our decisions progressively being automated, a few questions need to be addressed as we plunge in this automated world blindly.

1.   Why is the brain so gullible to these automations?

2.   Are these automations a new phenomenon of the last few decades or they existed?

3.   Does our mind have a natural bias to these automations and hence are sitting ducks to these newer algorithms?

Let us try to understand more about automations of thoughts.

Automation is defined as the technique, method, or system of operating or controlling a process by highly automatic means, as by electronic devices, reducing human intervention to a minimum.
To simplify it further it is the method of making a machine, a process, or a system work without being directly controlled by a person.

The drive to provide increased levels of control of electro-mechanical systems, and with it, a corresponding distancing of the human from direct system control has grown out of the belief that automated systems provide superior reliability, improved performance and reduced costs for the performance of many functions.

Similarly, we have the universe and nature around us, working in automation. Let me try to explain this in detail. The planets revolve around the sun and the satellites (the moon revolves around the earth in automation). Although it is not absolute because there are instances where the balance between them changes, what we know as variations in the gravitational force causing storms and cyclones.

 In physics, Gravitational force and the electromagnetic quantum dynamics are two principles to explain why the organism and the universe move in automation.

But the majority of the time, the universe tends to move in automation. Similarly, the life cycles of organisms on planet earth move in automation. Nobody can deny the fact that we are born, then we get young, turn old and finally die. These are the facts which we have to live with every single day of our life. The heart beats every single moment, the breath and the various organs like the liver makes bile or the kidneys making urine, they all move in automation without any voluntary control.

But there are instances when this automation is momentarily disturbed, which changes the balance. So as in an infectious disease or neoplasms or any other disease once the automation is broken, it rewires and starts moving into other automation, only this time it destroys the body rather than being in harmony. We call this a parasitic relationship rather than symbiotic. When we intervene with treatment in the form of medicines or therapy, we break this automation and try to get the body back to harmony or homeostasis.
The fact that the universe and all its beings are moving in automation is now well established. There are subtle moments which change this automation to make them move into new automation. For example comets or meteors changing the path.

Similarly, our brain and its pathways tend to automate. This has resulted in us making those micro and macro changes in the brain when we learn to ride a bicycle or a motorbike. Initially, when we learn to ride a bicycle we all have had fallen off balance at some moment. Once we have learned and the brain pathways have become autonomous, we do not necessarily get off balance easily and fall off the bicycle. Even when we are talking to someone while riding we are able to maintain the balance. But during our learning, we need to have maximum awareness and focus on the task, be it learning how to read and write or riding a bicycle. It can be learning how to communicate or the social interactions in early childhood. Our awareness is at its maximum. But once the learning is done, the brain and its pathway set the same task into automation.

Since the ancient history of mankind, reacting to a stressful situation or managing difficult emotions are some of the things has always been understated and not given its due importance. But today in this fast-paced world, managing thoughts and emotions has become one of the most essential skills. Multinational companies are on a lookout for such employees having high emotional quotient who can challenge this automation.

In many cases, automation has provided the desired benefits and has extended system functionality well beyond existing human capabilities. Along with these benefits, however, a certain price has been extracted.

In 1989, a US Air B-737 failed to take-off at New York’s LaGuardia Airport, landing in the nearby river (National Transportation Safety Board, 1990). The precipitating cause was an accidental disarming of the autothrottle. Neither the captain nor the first officer monitored the critical flight parameters in order to detect and correct the problem, thus the take-off was not aborted in a timely manner, resulting in the loss of the aircraft and two passengers.

In 1983, a Korean Airlines flight was shot down over the (then) USSR with no survivors. The aircraft was interpreted as hostile when it traveled into Soviet airspace without authorization or radio contact.

In each of these cases, the human operators overseeing the automated systems were unaware of the critical features of the systems they were operating. They were unaware of the state of the automated system and were unaware of the aircraft parameters the automation was responsible for.

The more we are aware of these automations, the more we will realize the horrendous effects of the technology on our minds.

 I am not anti-technology by any chance and strongly believe that embracing these advances are a must for a better future. But I also believe that these automations of thoughts are one of the primary reasons behind mental health diseases and are less highlighted in the day to day life. Too much dependence on technology lead to increase automations in our thinking resulting in being driven into a lonely world of machines which can never replace the social need of the human brain.

As we embrace the newer technologies we also need to embrace the old age methods of mindfulness, cultivate empathy and emotional intelligence which seems to be the most prudent solution to the automations created.

References: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/241260715_AUTOMATION_AND_SITUATION_AWARENESS_THE_ACCIDENT_AT_CALI_COLUMBIA

Life and growing up

     Life is such a funny chain of events with twists and turns which none of us can ever predict. We all seem so much in control but still very much fragile to the events that happen to us. Would  life still be so exciting if it was so predictable and we would have all achieved our targets. I can bet that most of the people who were considered highly talented by friends teachers and family end up in a very different way. Rarely any of them would agree that have ended  up in a completely  different  path then they would have ever imagined. This is what makes  man to actually take up the challenge  when in the bottom of their  hearts they all know that that life is a teacher who has its mood swings more than your wife and more naughty than your kids.....
Your destiny like many say is predefined and decided but still we all do not want to accept it. I can challenge that most  of us have accepted or will accept the fact only when we realise that we can not do anything about future .
The future like many learned men have said is always in dark.,it is we who have too throw light on the path and that is the sole motive of our life. If we are able to find the path we coin the word "success" otherwise we are only like a traveler running from pillar to post in search of the inner peace.
             So what changes from our childhood to our senility..... Is it our innocence or is it our ability to trust others.... I think most of us will agree the innocence with which we trust people  dies as we grow older and older. The ability to believe that all helping hand need not be trusted....I think that is what we humans  term the word experience...
Experience is nothing but our ability not to trust blindly what our fellow humans blindly want us to believe or do. The ability to see the world  in reality rather than the dream world is what growing up is all about....
Not everyone of is lucky that this phase of childhood to teenage is without any major harsh reality of life.......For the few unfortunate ones that lays the foundation stone for various psychological disorders for  in the latter stage. By a study in uk it was concluded  that childhood insults are one of the primary and strongest reasons for adult psychological disorders....
But still life is very beautiful as it has lots of surprises, challenges and above all emotions which makes this journey unique to each and every  indivisual. Inspite of none of us having a complete control on the chain of events we have absolute power to derive happiness and content from whatever good or bad it has to offer us